What's In A Name?

I've had a lot of people ask me if we have picked a name out for our baby now that we know it's a girl. The short answer to that is yes. I've had the name Aubrey in my lineup for a while now, and I think (John still gets a vote) that is what the baby's name will be.

Now here's the long answer, and I mean long:

(A few months ago) Before I was even sure if I was pregnant or not, I was laying on my bed not feeling well. Out of nowhere the name Aubrey entered my mind. I was fairly certain then that I was pregnant and that this baby would be a girl. I considered the name Aubrey when I was pregnant with Baby Girl, but it didn't feel right.

(About 25 years ago)Here is where I need to give you a little background info. My Mom had four kids. She had to have C-sections with all of us. Back then they didn't cut horizontally, they cut vertically all the way down your stomach. It was hard to recover from. While my Mom was delivering her fourth baby there were complications and she was told that she should not have any more children. I don't know exactly what the complications were, but I do remember my Mom not getting out of bed for a long time and we had sisters in the ward come over and help her clean and cook and take care of us.

(About 9 years ago)Fast forward many years. I am talking to my Uncle (my Mom's brother) a few years after my Mom passed away. He tells me that my Mom told him once that she always felt that she had one more baby, and she felt that it would have been a girl, and she would have named her Aubrey. I liked that name and thought to myself when I have a girl I'll name her Aubrey in honor of my Mother.

(Today) I told you it was a long story. Like I said, I had considered this name for Baby Girl, but for some reason it didn't feel right. Now I know the reason for that. To be honest with you, I was happy with four kids and didn't really want another one. So, I thought that we wouldn't get to use the name Aubrey. It was about a year ago that I started to get the feeling that we had one more, it has just taken me a while to be ready for it.

Now I don't know for sure, but I think that there is some contact between those who have passed away and those who have not come to this Earth yet. I am fairly certain that my Mom - though deprived of seeing my kids here on Earth - knew and loved them before they were born. How fitting that my child who has been able to spend the longest time with her should bear the name that she would have given her daughter if she was able to have more children. I feel that this baby has blessings yet to bring to our family, and though this has been my hardest pregnancy I know it will be worth it in the end.